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I am sorry, we didn't get along
somehow I just did not fit - did not belong
It was like you took one look
and I didn't fit the life of your book

I felt you came over as too much of the policeman
Interrogating and analyzing
Delving too much and wanting me to explain
I could not answer - You were being a pain

My relationship and feelings of Jesus are my own
even on this topic it would seem I am alone
I remind myself that He knows all about me inside and out
there are no secrets hidden from Him or Him to find out

God cannot be put into a box of people's own making
He is much larger than people can imagine
He is everywhere at once - all over the world
Yet small enough to be in hearts of believing men, women, boys and girls

I did not lie to you, even though you think I did
I did not know why at the time the actions that I took
They were put in place, right from the start
So I could feel safe inside, within my heart

All through my travels, I had made my own arrangements
How to arrive there and how I would depart
Brenda drove us up, she to stay a week with you
plans changed from our discussions - what was I to do?

I wrote James of my concerns
and asked him to look at bus/train timetables
They were innocent requests and
I did not think they would be hurdles

Getting into an argument early in the mornings
I am not properly awake and not at my best
and in your home and out of my boundaries
really unnerved me. - You know the rest

OK, I have told you Kiwi men and women are different to Yanks
We are more conservative and do not 'bare our souls'
If you started asking too many personal questions
someone is likely to end up in the holding tanks

some Kiwi's are very aggressive, fistycuffs our weapon
many do not like strangers delving and questioning
but on the whole we are a friendly bunch
just don't poke your nose in and ask too much

Amanda Martin-Shaver
September 1999

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Amanda Martin-Shaver